Trials and Tender Mercies

It’s been a while sense I’ve typed up a real update with what’s been going on with us. Things have been a roller coaster ride sense November. We’ve had up’s and down’s and twists and turns that we never expected.

It all started in November. Nate had to go to Wilmington NC for the entire month to do a rotation out there; the only time I got to see him was when he snuck home and surprised me (and Alyssa) on her first birthday. While he was gone I had things pretty well under control, but the last half of the month started to unravel.

I’m on the activities committee for our ward (church) and we were in the midst of planning our ward Christmas party. This year we were encouraged to do it differently. They wanted to have more of an open house, with a program and lots of music and a few talks. Clear back in June when I was called I was told that they wanted this to be a big thing. I was totally excited. I’m all about planning BIG. Big is my specialty. We have an awesome chair person and I knew that this had the potential to be awesome.

The committee didn’t want this to be a pot luck, so we all divided up different treat that we would be solely in charge of. I agreed to make fudge. That meant that I needed to make around 400 pieces of fudge, regular and walnut, cut them into individual squares and bring them to the church that day. I didn’t think that would be too hard.

The first thing I wanted for the program was a choir. After all, what is Christmas without a choir? We have lots of musical talent in our ward, but our choir director was released over a year ago now, and we’ve had to do without. I thought it would be an awesome time to bring back our rock’n choir. After Holly (the chair person) and I both had asked about it we were told that the bishopric was “on it”, and I tried to leave it at that. But I was stressing over it. After all… I was put in charge of the music program. Earlier I had even offered that if they couldn’t find anyone to be the director that I would be willing to lead it, and maybe we could pull together a “Christmas Choir” so people could sing the carols and not feel obligated to stay with it all year long. Again I was told that they were “on it.” This was 8 weeks before the program. I had MTAB arrangements ready on hand to give to who ever they called so we could be off and running. And every week I waited anxiously to hear who had been called. To make a long story shorter… I’m still waiting.

3 weeks before the program there was an announcement in church for everyone to come to the ward Christmas program, that there was going to be great spiritual messages, and beautiful musical numbers. I literally almost laughed out loud. Did they know something that I didn’t know? At that point not one musical number had been prepared. It was at that point that a few things clicked.

#1 - We were not going to have a choir.
#2 – I needed to pull together some special musical numbers, and fast.
#3 – I was going to experience a very stressful next few weeks.
#4 – I was deeply disappointed.

Music in my family is huge. My favorite part of Christmas is the music. I LOVE singing in the church choir. It just isn’t Christmas without a Christmas choir. I was so devastated, and completely let down.

I quickly began calling as many people as I could and was able to pull together a couple musical numbers, I organized a “relief society” choir and we arranged to have the primary and nursery sing a couple of songs as well. It wasn’t near as grandiose as I wanted, but it would still be nice.

While I was in the midst of planning this, I was also working on planning Andrew’s baptism. Andrew’s birthday was on November 30th, which was on a Sunday. I thought it would be perfect to baptize him on his birthday. We originally planned it for that day, but then Nate got an interview invitation that he couldn’t plan for any other day. I was a little disappointed, but reminded myself that it doesn’t’ matter what day he got baptized, but as long as he was baptized. We pushed it back to the next week Dec. 7th. I worked it out with the ward, and even had in printed in the ward bulletin. On Tuesday before his baptism was scheduled Nate got back from his interview (which went very well) and while he was unpacking we were talking about his baptism program. I told Nate that I was excited for that Sunday.

Nate hesitated and said, “You mean Saturday.”

“No” I said, “It’s going to be on Sunday, right after church remember?”

Nate got this look of panic on his face, and he said in this apologetic tone, “I could have sworn it was on Saturday… I can’t do it on Sunday… I have an interview in Tennessee on Sunday.”

I would have laughed if I wasn’t so shocked. “Are you serious?”

The next day was Wednesday. Andrew was going to have his interview with the Bishop to be baptized, and it was his first day going to scouts.

Here are some pictures of Andrew looking handsome in his scout uniform on that day.

I was going to take Andrew early so he could have his interview, and hopefully I could speak quickly to the Bishop about the baptism (which I was so embarrassed about) and about all the other stresses that I had on me. After being a single Mom for the month, and having Nate running all over the country for this interview and that, I needed to get all my frustration off of my chest about the whole choir problem with the ward program that was only a week away. I was stressing out so bad… I’ve never been so close to a nervous breakdown. I was almost crying all the time… I was a mess.

We got to the church and the Bishop was also holding Tithing settlement at that time and was running behind. I didn’t want Andrew to miss his scout meeting, and because I knew he wasn’t getting baptized any time soon any more I told him to hurry off to scouts. I also knew that he wouldn’t have time to sit and talk with me either if he was running behind, so I left a message for him through one of his clerks. I told him. “Please tell the Bishop that Andrew is not going to make his interview today, and that he is not getting baptized.” Stan’s face looked totally shocked, so I explained to him about Nate having to be out of town.

I couldn’t stand sitting in the church at that time. I was a mess. Every time I started to think about the Christmas program, or the baptism, I started getting all weepy eyed, and that made me even madder. So I took Austin and told him that we were going to go to Wendy’s and get some ice cream until Andrew was done with scouts.

We jumped in the van and drove down the road to Wendy’s. I parked on the other side of the building, and jumped out, only to realize that there wasn’t an entrance on that side, and I didn’t want to walk through the drive threw area to go in, so I told Austin to get back into the car, and we would drive to the other side.

I stuck the key in to the ignition, and turned. The van reluctantly started… sputtered, then died. … are you kidding me? I tried again, this time it didn’t even turn over. In that moment I felt a million different feelings. I hugged my steering wheel and felt a feeling of surrender. I give up. What do you want? That’s about the time it hit me. He wanted me to come to Him with my trials and frustrations. I was trying to figure it all myself. I was trying to do everything myself. I hadn’t gone to Him and asked for strength, or guidance or help at all. I think that He wanted me to stop for a minute and turn to Him. So He literally stopped me.

I quietly asked Austin to say a prayer for our car to start. I quietly prayed for faith. He said a sweet prayer, full of faith that all children somehow posses. When he finished, I quietly prayed again that the car would start, and the scripture “Help Thou my unbelief” came to mind. I turned the key. The car started. I cried.

I didn’t want to push my luck with the car so I apologized to Austin and told him we were driving right back to the church so incase it didn’t start again there would be people there to help us.

Once back at the church I took Austin to the gym to let him run around. I taught him a little volleyball, and Alyssa loved crawling around chasing all the balls. Then Brother Hendricks came in and we “peppered” (bump, set, spiked, the ball at each other). It felt so good to get some exercise and have something to hit! J

When scout was over I was walking down the hall to get Andrew and the Bishop was standing there, and he looked at me for a second and said, “Hey Becky, can I talk with you for a minute?” I felt immediately that the Lord had inspired him and said, “Yes.”

We went into his office and I was able to tell him about my stress and frustration with everything. Literally everything that I was trying to get accomplished was becoming complicated… right down to that darn fudge. I went to make a batch, and pulled some sugar out of my cupboard, and when I opened it the whole bag was as hard as a rock! So I had to drive to the store to get more… it’s a little thing, but just one example of the MANY things that were adding up. It felt good being able to talk to him about it all, and we closed with a prayer, and he prayed that I would feel more peace in my life. I immediately felt it.

When I got the kids in the car, I said a quiet prayer, and the car started right up again.

When I took the kids to school, I said a prayer, and it started.

Life it’s self didn’t simplify, but the little things weren’t piling up as much. And I did feel more peace in my life.

A couple of days later Nate was driving home from quite the week.

He had flown out to Vegas that week, came home to sleep, then woke up early to drive to Danville PA. had dinner with the residents there, had an interview the next morning, as soon as the interview was over he jumped into the car and raced to Richmond VA to catch the residents dinner there, then had the official interview in Richmond the next morning. Then he was done for a couple of days, until he was going to have to go to Tenn. For an interview (a different one than the other TN one). I was so excited to see him. At about 7:00 he called me.

“Becky my cell phone is about to die, but I broke down. I’m on HWY 64 (I think that’s what it was) by mile marker xxx, call the hwy patrol to come and get me.”

He was driving down a hill when the engine just totally went out on him. Luckily (tender mercy) he was going down hill as at that point in the road there was no shoulder, so he was able to coast to the bottom where there was a small shoulder… he was barely able to get his car out of the road. They Highway patrol found him, and he spent the night in Waynesboro. The next day he rented a car and drove home. The day after that he drove his rental to his next interview. If there is such thing as “good timing” for a car to break down he found it. What a blessing that he didn’t have to miss an interview.

Turns out that when the timing belt broke on the Stratus + it busted out some pistons it =’s NEW ENGINE! What’s $2000.00 to some broke med-school kids.

That’s when I decided to start counting my blessings. I told Nate, “at least we have our health”. That’s when we all got sick. For the whole month of December someone in the house was sick! We had the flu, the pukes, the runs, the snots, the pink eye, the whole shebang! So… we were all sick for a while. Good times.

When Nate came home from his interview we did some talking. Mercifully as a 4th year med-student we qualified to take out a “relocation loan”. YEA MORE LOANS! We did so hoping that we could use any left over money to pay off credit cards (how else do you think Nate could shuttle around the country?). After doing some research, thinking and praying we decided that we were going to need to go van shopping. After all, the van was literally running on a prayer.

We went to Shelor, and looked at a few used vans. Most of them were going for around $10,000 bucks. We were going to test drive a Kia, but when it started it sounded like the engine was going to fall out of it, so we just nixed it. After all, the whole point of buying a car was to find one that would be dependable for the next few years.

After not finding any thing at what most people call the “cheap place”, we drove down the road to Duncan to see if they had any used vans. We started driving down some new vans, just dreaming, and looking at their $19,000 price tags, when we found one in the midst of them for $11,000. We immediately stopped and took a look. Turns out it was what’s called a “throw away” vehicle. The dealership gets a vehicle without any of the bells and whistles like DVD Player, push button sliding doors, and all that jazz, and they mark it down really low just to get people in the door, then they can usually talk people into a “bells and whistles” model. Crap, we didn’t care for that junk, we just wanted a car that ran! So… for pretty much the same amount of money we would have dropped on a piece of hud old used van. We bought it. For $6000 UNDER BLUE BOOK! It’s a 2008 Chrysler Town and Country. It is still under factory warrantee, and is covered for 4 more years! That’s going to get us through residency!!! What a blessing.

Sorry I don't have a front view of it... it was pouring rain when I took this picture so I only got a side shot from the protected area of my front patio.

A few days later our other car was done, and we drove up to get it. She’s doing great now! And Nate says she’s getting around 34 miles to the gallon! Who needs a hybrid?

Now for our latest news.

Nate is FINALLY DONE INTERVIEWING! He interviewed at 14 facilities all over the country! His last interviews were in Akron OH. The first was at Akron General, and the last at Akron City (Summa). He really liked both programs a lot. As Nate finished up his last interview in Summa, he was walking out with the other interviewees and the program director came running out and called, “Nate, come here.” Nate was pretty surprised, and went over. Dr. Ferris was getting ready to get scrubbed in for a c-section so he only had a minute but he said, “Nate, everyone has come up to me and told me what an awesome applicant you are, and everyone loves you. Now, I’ve never done this before, but as a DO you can sign outside the match, and if you are interested, I would like to offer that to you.” Needless to say, Nate was totally shocked. Dr. Ferris said, “Don’t answer me now, go home, talk to your wife about it, and call me back and let me know.” So he did.

We went down the list of all the places he interviewed at and compared the pros and cons to all of them. Nate talked to some buddies of his that have been to Summa, and one who’s father is an attending physician there, and they all said how much they loved it. So after fasting and praying about it, we are extremely happy to say.
WE ARE MOVING TO AKRON OHIO FOR RESIDENCY!
Nate called last night and agreed to sign out side the match! Nate is definately going to be an OB/GYN!
We are so blessed that we don’t have to wait until March to find out!
Carie, Crystal, Janie and Holly we are crossing our fingers that you all move close!!!

Here is a picture of the hospital where Nate will be working.

So, that’s my stories of trials and tender mercies. We were marveling at how it all worked out. Nate could have had Akron as one of his first interviews, but his schedule was full for October, so he had to push it back to January. I think that the Lord wanted us to gain some experience in our trials by having him go to all of those other interviews. We are so excited! We are going to be only 3 hours away from my Sister Tyanna, only 4 hours away from Nate’s brother Jon. Only 45 minutes away from Kirtland Oh! Only 3 ½ hours away from Niagara Falls! We are going to have some fun vacations… when Nate isn’t working his butt off!

I’m so grateful that I lived through the trials, so I can see all the blessing that came from them!

Snow here we come!